God’s Gunner’s, Booty Bandits, & Bad Boys
By R25288 ( c ) 2006
Chapter Five
May I Please Go Home Now
“Therefore if I know not the meaning of the voice, I shall be unto him that speaketh a barbarian, and he that speaketh shall be a barbarian unto me.”
I Corinthians 14:11
So too is it with the criminal mind, like the gay mind, it is a language that many of us have no understanding of, and it frightens us, as the unknown usually does. In breaking down the walls of misunderstanding, we open the doors to new perceptions, and increase our wisdom, tolerance, and Godliness.
Lunch consisted of a bag with a peanut butter sandwich, a turkey sandwich, and a cookie in it. No Grey Poupon mustard was offered. As a Finalist in the Tampa Bay Chef’s Open, prison cuisine was not my favorite, but it was always nutritious, and tastier than I had expected.
After having my picture taken, and my fingerprints, I finally decided that I was tired of sitting on the Group W benches, with too many of my intellectually challenged brothers in blue. I approached an officer, and pointed out page two in the manual, and requested protective custody.
I looked around the room at fifty plus other criminals. I now had figured out that half of the guys came from Pinellas County with me, and the other half were from Pasco County, and they had arrived just shortly before us.
I was told that I was now in PC-Predetermination Confinement status. I was led off shackled and handcuffed to dorm E2, which was the unit for Administrative Confinement.
I was placed in cell number eight, alone. There was a toilet, sink, and two bunk beds attached to the wall. It had a window to the outdoors. There was a slat in the door for food trays to be placed through, and it had a window. I was next to the back door.
I had been given blue slip on cloth type shoes, size ten. They fit fine. They were called “bo bo’s,” and I still don’t know why. I was also given a white 2x tee shirt, white 2x boxers, white socks, and a 2x orange jump suit. It had five snap-ons, four of which were capable of snapping.
I was given a black blanket, two white sheets, one pillow case, with no pillow, a comb, which I had no use for, a toothbrush, a tube of toothpaste, and one roll of toilet paper.
After another strip search, I was left alone. I made the lower bunk, which I had been assigned to. This cell was to be my home for the next seventy-seven days, or eleven weeks, or one thousand, eight hundred and forty-eight hours, but who’s counting?
The cell was about six feet by nine feet. The food slat was about one third of the way up from the floor, in the door, about four inches by twelve inches. It was also where I would stoop to get handcuffed. There was also a stainless steel sink, and toilet at the end of the bed, on the right side. The bottom of the door had a four inch gap for empty food trays to be slid out. Over the sink was a six inch by nine inch scratched up metal mirror. Suffice it to say that these are all guesstimations, as rulers were never provided.
Prison life is the art of maximizing minimalism, and everything has value.
Beside the sink, next to the door, was the stainless steel toilet. The sink had two push buttons for both the cold and hot water. The cold water button did not operate for my first thirty days. The toilet button was above the toilet, on the wall, and had a habit of sticking. The toilet had no liftable padded seat like I was use to, in fact, it had no liftable seat at all. Oh, the adjustments prison life forces on one.
The view out of my cell door window was of the staff desk, about sixty feet away, by the front door. Fortunately, there was a clock above the desk. I could not see cells one through seven to my right, but I could see cells nine through fourteen, in front of me.
Beside cells one and fourteen was a single person shower room, about the size of a small closet. Cell fourteen was used for storage, and a bathroom for the staff, and trustees. By the front door was floor to ceiling plexiglass, looking out to the control room. I use to work in a control room. Now I am the dangerous one being controlled. What goes around sometimes comes around. I was in Unit 2 of E dorm, and Unit 1 was to our right, not visible. Units 3 and 4 were visible through the plexiglass, through the Control station.
On top of cells one through fourteen, were cells fifteen through twenty-eight. It was similar to old prison movies, with grated metal stairs at both ends leading up to a catwalk of about three feet in diameter, surrounded by a couple of guard rails.
My window facing the outdoors was on the back wall, about five feet from the floor, about forty inches wide by twenty inches tall. There was a knob that allowed the window to be opened. Only about one third of the window was openable.
There was a medical prefab type like building ten feet away from my window, like a mobile home. Past it was the Disciplinary Confinement building. I could see four windows there. There were more, but the medical building blocked seeing any more. The windows were high, at about the ten foot level, from the ground. Over the DC building, I could see the tops of a few trees. To the right looking out, I could see more fences, with spiraling barbed wire. With the hum of the air conditioning unit at the the medical building, I laid down to nap. Sleep is a healer.
“I am debtor both to the Greeks, and to the Barbarians; both to the wise, and to the unwise.”
Romans 1:14
In the struggle between good and evil, God is only a letter removed from good, and evil is spelled vile. The man in white is not always the good guy, and the man in black may be good.
The law means what it says, or does it? When we ignore and misinterpret the law, which is semantics, and the study of language, and the meaning of words; when justice is abused, we have a denial of justice, and people like me imprisoned, who shouldn’t be.
Florida Statutes 918.10 (1) Charge to Jury, reads:
“At the conclusion of argument of counsel, the court shall charge the jury. The charge shall be only on the law of the case and must include the penalty for which the accused is being charged.”
I represented myself at trial, and I asked the Judge to comply with the above law, and I did so on the record. On this subject, the Florida Attorney General has said:
“Failure to comply with statute would not be reversible error in a particualar case if request therefore was not made by or in behalf of the defendant.” 1939 Opp Atty Gen 87
Under Brown v State, 206 So.2d 377 (1968):
“Failure to give an instruction is of no avail on appeal unless it is requested and improperly refused at trial level.”
Under Williams v State, 370 So. 2d 902 (1980):
“Word ‘Shall’ as used by Supreme Court when establishing rules of court procedure mean exactly what it usually means as defined in accepted dictionary, and thus it is error for trial court to refuse request to charge on maximum and minimum sentence which may be imposed.”
Under McLaughlin v State, 721 So. 2d 1170 (1998), the Florida Supreme Court said this:
“When language of statute is clear and unambiguous and conveys clear and definte meaning, there is no occassion for resorting to rules of statutory interpretations and construction; statute must be given its plain and obvious meaning.”
Under West’s Florida Statutes Annotated subsection 775.021 (2003):
“(1) The provisions of this code and offenses defined by other statutes shall be strictly construed; When the language is susceptible of differing construction, it shall be construed most favorably to the accused.”
Here is just one example of the justice I received, taken from page 679 of my trial transcript, which is public information, on this very issue, and my request to the Court to comply with the above law:
“The Court: Okay.
The Prosecutor: “Do you want me to research that or have you satisfied yourself?
“The Court: I’m satisfied. It says that, but it doesn’t mean it.
The Prosecutor: “Okay. Is that for capital cases?
“The Court: I think there’s some case law that I’ve been apprized(sic) of that seems to suggest it’s related capital cases, and there’s still some confusion about it, although it’s pretty clear that it doesn’t apply in this situation.
“But, Mr. Eckhardt, again I’ll say what I did earlier, I want to confirm that you brought up something that none of us had ever heard of.
The Prosecutor: “Baffled us.
“The Court: Baffled us absolutely, and I put out a call for further information about it, and I’m satisfied that it would not be appropriate to instruct the jury on penalty for what you’re charged with, and I don’t intend to do it.”
They got baffled, and I got fifteen years. My dear gentle reader, the Judge even said on the record that I was not a threat to society. My crime was being a Vietnam War Protester, and a political junkie.
Americans are highly religious, but only on their own terms. So, I, like them, am highly religious. I can be both gay, and a Christian. The problem, my dear Brutus, lies not in me, but in thine eye. I refuse to be excluded, or buy the definition that God doesn’t like me. God loves me, and my brothers in blue, and my gay brothers and lesbian sisters. God not only made Adam and Eve, but also Adam and Steve, and Eve and Edith.
Those who think otherwise, would prefer for gays to continue to live in the closet, blacks to return to the back of the bus, Hispanics to return to Mexico, and women to return to the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant. Neither your prisons, nor your hating policies…
Tom was talking to his Ma:
“They sat silent in the coal-black cave of vines. Ma said, ‘How’m I gonna know bout you? They might kill ya an’ I wouldn’ know. They might hurt ya. How ‘m I gonna know?
“Tom laughed uneasily. Well maybe like Casy says, a fella ain’t got a soul of his own, but on’y a piece of a big one-an’ then-
Then what, Tom?
Then it don’ matter. Then I’ll be all aroun’ in the dark. I’ll be ever’where-wherever you look. Wherever they’s a fight so hungry people can eat. I’ll be there. Whenever they’s a cop beatin’ up a guy. I’ll be there. If Casy knowed, why, I’ll be in the ways guys yell when they’re mad an-I’ll be in the ways kid laugh when they’re hungry an’ they know supper’s ready.
“An’ when our folks eat the stuff they raise an’ live in the houses they build-why, I’ll be there. See? God I’m talking like Casy. Comes of thinkin about him so much. Seems like I can see him sometimes.
“I don’t un’erstan’, Ma said. I don’t really know.
“Me neither’, said Tom. ‘It’s jus’ stuff I been thinkin about. Get thinkin’ a lot when you ain’t movin’ aroun’. You got to get back, Ma.”
From, The Grapes Of Wrath, by John Steinbeck.
My prison was Liberty Correctional Institution, in Bristol, Florida, in the panhandle, and it provided me an “ain’t movin’ aroun’” place, and time to think, and write.
“Now the Lord is that Spirit: and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.”
II Corinthians 3:17
God gave me the gift of prison, and I decided to go into uncharted waters. I did what has never been done before-an in depth study of the criminal mind, by an inmate, of inmates, from behind the razorwire, over three and a half years. It is mind blowing. I interviewed one hundred inmates, with a seventy-five item questionaire, that I developed. The questions ranged from family history, to education, to medical, to politics, to sexual orientation, to greatest lifetime achievement, to favorite movies, colors, TV shows, to most violence seen in prison, and on the streets, to tatoos and gold teeth, to worst crimes committed, to religion, their thoughts on 9/11, to their first and best sexual experiences, to their thoughts on gangs, gays, drugs, gambling, gunnin (the act of masterbation while looking at the back of a female staff), their thoughts on prison, and who belongs there, to changes they would like to see in prison, to what was their greatest lesson of prison. While not purely scientific, the results have merit, and are worthy of further study.
I spent four years at this level four prison. Level seven being the most maximum. I interviewed murderers, bank robbers, rapists, child molesters, kidnappers, drug dealers, prostitutes, and gang members. They were Democrats, Republicans, and Independents. They were straight, gay, bisexual, and transexual.
They all knew I was gay, and what they said would be made public. I believe the interview process was a confessional for most of them. Because I loved them, and was one of them, allowed for truthfulness that will amaze you. I slowed down doing the interviews, because their stories of abuse, anger, despair, and the violence they had received, and inflicted onto others was more than I could bear. While I had law enforcement, and interviewing experience and training, I had never received priestly training, and their pain hurt my soul.
In the final analysis, prison is full of fear, from the brown shirts-officers, to the blue shirts-inmates, to the white shirts-administration. Only in looking at each other as children of God, each worthy of love, may we hope to bring each other up. For the truth is we must go up together, the alternative offers no hope.
Each interview took approximately forty-five minutes. Only three percent of my study requested to be anonymous. One was a convicted child abuser, one had a father who had killed a police officer. The interesting thing was that those three never said anything incriminating. I will honor their request.
In December, 2005, I finally sat down and began correlating the data, and reading it all, from the first interview in April, 2002. It was voluminous. It was shocking and sad. It was humorous and inspirational. It is the truth, as told to me, and I believe it represents the truth. No quotes or data were invented, or deleted.
To the question of, What was your worst crime committed? Some would respond with, “I don’t know if I want to answer that.” I would respond with, “You decide, I’m writing a book.”
Nineteen percent of my study admitted to crimes they had never been charged with, up to and including murders in three states, kidnapping, ID theft, and various shootings. Here is one response to the WCC (worst crime committed ) question:
” I don’t know-shit they charged me with-I ain’t going to tell you what I didn’t get caught for. Judges read. Lawyers read.”
Here is a response to the question I asked another regarding, Do you consider yourself a violent person?:
“No more than the next man. I’ve killed seven times on different streets in New York, North Carolina, and Florida.”(Never charged with manslaughter or murder).
To the WCC question, another said:
“Murder. I was never charged.”
When I followed up with, In Maryland or Florida? He responded with:
“I can’t say that.”(Released from prison).
Another responded to the WCC question with:
“First degree murder-never charged.”
When I asked, What was your vocation on the streets? He replied:
“Robbing.”
When I asked, What are your future plans? He responded:
“Rob.”
I asked another inmate, Do you have gold teeth, and if so what do they signify? He responded with:
I have three gold teeth-I don’t want to answer what they signify…I’m taking them out when I get out…each one represents a person I shot-all still alive-over drugs-never charged-respect-two in wheelchairs…other dead.” (Released-2003).
As you can see, they all can’t be alive, if one is dead. That was how the interviews went. I was shocked by the lack of remorse by some, and continually amazed at their openness.
To the WCC question , another responded with:
“Murder-never charged-drive by shooting in 1986, in St. Petersburg, (Florida)-don’t know number hurt-mother asked about it-two dead, others shot up-three doing the shooting-AK 47-one weapon, each times three-issue over rob-blacks-no one ever charged-considered an unsolved crime today-I’m concerned over telling you-no, can’t prove I did it.”
One is not allowed tape recorders in prison, and I never took short hand, so the answers are broken up like that above. After I got a few words, sometimes whole sentences, I would follow it up with another question. So, like above, there was one weapon used, and each person shot three times. Only blacks were involved, and the shooting was over a robbery.
Another reponded to the WCC question with:
“Shot someone.”
When I followed it up with, Killed? He responded:
“No comment.”
To my question of, What are your future plans? Another inmate said:
Rape, rob, and pillage-all DOC officials of any institution whether I’ve been there or not.”
Yes, Virginia, we really do need some prisons to protect society. The inmates in my study ranged from age twenty to fifty-six, with an average age of thirty-four. Fifty-six percent were black, thirty-five percent were white, seven percent were Hispanic, and two percent were Asian.
For thirty-eight percent, this was their first time in prison; thirty-seven percent had been here once before; twelve percent had been here twice before; eight percent had been here three times before; four percent had been here four times before; and one percent had been here eight times before. The one percenter listed his vocation as, “Shoplifting.”
Thirty-one percent have already been released to the streets; twenty-three percent will be released between now and 2010; forty-three percent have release dates after 2010, or no release date; three percent I catagorized as unknown.
Twenty-nine percent had some college; sixteen percent had GED’s; thirty-nine percent had less than high school diplomas; fourteen percent had high school diplomas; and two percent unknown.
Thirty-four percent identified themselves as straight sexually; twenty-one percent identified themselves as straight, but admitted to more than one adult homosexual experience; twenty percent identified themselves as gay; twenty-four percent identified themselves as bisexual; and one percent identified as transexual.
The number one rated favorite TV show was CSI, at thirteen percent. The number one rated favorite movie was Scarface, at eight percent, second was Titanic, at six percent. Blue was the favorite color at thirty-eight percent, and second was red at twenty-one percent.
Some of the answers to, What is your greatest lifetime achievement?
“Having a son-very smart-not taking path I took.”
“My daughter.”
“High School Student President.”
“I don’t think I got one.”
“I have learned for myself that if I do not make no good choices for me. I didn’t respect law or other people-I had a negative attitude toward society. I can see different now, and I can make better choices, and not see this place no more.”
“Overcoming hate of myself, because I’m gay-accepting myself.”
“Becoming a Christian.”
“Knowledge I’ve gained concerning God’s word and the law.”
“Getting my breasts. Oh, that felt lovely. That was something I always wanted to do.”
“Always wanted to be a drug dealer-when got first key to sell.”
“Making a change within myself. The way I look at life in being a better person. Once I didn’t care about living-it was an obstacle. I did what I did. I see more to life than negativity-so much. I can’t sum it up in a couple words. Now I feel I can get out and make it. I have a history pattern of institutional progress. I broke that cycle-things I’ve learned since being in prison. I care more for myself, people that love me, children that need me, to do what’s right for myself, my children.”
The religious breakdown in my study was thirty-five percent identified themselves as Baptists; thirty-one percent identified as Christian; eleven percent as Catholic; eleven percent as non-religious; four percent nothing noted; two percent as Buddhists; one percent Hebrew Israelite; one percent Orthodox Jew; one percent Muslim; one percent Jehovah Witness; one percent Judaism; and one percent House of Yahweh.
Question sixty-four was, What was your religious upbringing? Question sixty-five was, Do you believe in God? And question sixty-six was, If so, what is God to you? Some of the answers:
“Baptist. Yes. Someone that watches out for me, and makes sure I make it to see tomorrow.”
“Baptist. Yes A being up there, watching everything. Why he don’t get involved, I don’t know.”
“Christian-firm believer in the Bible. Yes. The backbone of my strength since I’ve been incarcerated-helped me in alot of ways.”
“Christian. Yes. Someone with greater power than me.”
“Christian, now Judaism. Born Jewish-not raised however. Yes. Indescribable entity or force.”
“Baptist. I ain’t seen him.”
“Catholic. Spiritual last two sentences-went to everything. This time, I’ve not been once to the Chapel here. No need for Chaplains here.”
“Baptists. That’s a tough question. Let’s come back to that one…God is anything that a person, he or she, puts all of his time into praising or glorifying.”
“Islam, and parents. Yes. Something that has no partners. God is a just and forgiving God.”
“Baptist. Of course, I am God. Supreme being is a higher God, lower God equals me.”
“Buddhist-open minded.”
“Jehovah Witness. Don’t consider myself spiritual or religious. I just believe I’m saved by grace of Jehovah God.”
“Baptist, now no religion. Yes. God is my heart, I guess, something instilled in me.”
“I was a Baptist. I don’t have one no more. Too much cointradiction over which one is suppose to be right. When I went to church, there was too much trying and bullshit.”
“Everybody here is a body of God.”
“Mixed Buddhist/Catholic. Yes. Essence of good.”
“I try to draw others close to Christ, so I’m a transparent Christian. Yes. Christ has given me life. I want to live life the way he wants me to, so setting myself apart from this world for service of God according to his prescription for life.”
“Episcopal, not a Christian. I was into booty. Does that make me a Buddhist? No world religion. I’m a tree hugger.”
“I was brought up Roman Catholic. Not in the way people believe in God. I believe in a superior being, but not of the Bible. Actually, the Bible’s an evil little book. Every major war has religious conotation to it. God is me. I make my own destiny, not attributable to God, but to me. God, to me, is an omen of evil.”
“Baptist. Yes. She is, oh, so forgiving, understanding, and patient with me. Alot of people will throw the Bible in your face. He’s perfect, and if I’m made in his image, I must be too, cause he don’t make mistakes.”
“And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”
John 8:32
